I am a BITCH....Don't Piss Me Off

I am angry tonight...very, very, very angry!  And that makes me ANGRY!  Because now I have no patience with my kids, my animals or anyone else and they are not the ones who made me angry!

If you know me, you know I am a person who wants to "save the world" (I've mentioned this before.)  I will save animals, and people. I will give you anything I can, a roof over your head, the shirt off my back, I will feed you, I will give you the presents under my tree......I am not a millionaire so I can't give you money, but I will do what I can to help you, if you have a specific need, I will try to fill it.  My family lives in perpetual fear that they will come home for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or just dinner one night and the table will be full of homeless people....and they will smile, make coversation and serve and do everything I have taught them to do to make everyone happy because that's just the way it is!

I am a sucker....I will listen to your hard luck story....and I will try to help.  I don't understand how the people I help can take advantage of others....it hurts me more than I can say!  The world should not be like this....I don't want to be disappointed...when I see a guy holding a sign that says "will work for food," if I don't have work, then I will give him my last $5 because I do have food.  Are some of these people taking advantage of me?  Well yes they are, but I will take that chance. 

Is it so much to hope that the people you help will Pay It Forward?  I do stupid stuff, like pay for the meal of the next car behind me in the drive-thru, or drop a $100 bill on the counter for someone I see paying for their groceries with food stamps, so maybe they will have an extra $100 worth of food this month.  And I know that many of you are thinking I'm an idiot because some of those people will take that extra $100 and sell it off for something else...but I live in a small town in Kansas, not a big city, so I hope they will just be happy for that extra $100.

When you live in a small town you know alot of people....maybe KNOW is not the right word but I am involved in the PTA, I am in the school several times a week, my children participate in local sports...even if you don't know me...good or bad you've probably heard of me.  I would hope that if some stranger walked into town today and asked people about me they would hear mostly good things...sure there will be bad stuff too, but I hope I am well thought of in our small town.

Please don't think, reading that last paragraph, that I am someone who craves acceptance or atta' girls, I'm not.  I speak my mind, good or bad, I say stuff I shouldn't, I yell at my kids at their games, I do alot of things that can allienate people.  I do things behind the scenes in many cases, and I don't care if anyone ever knows about it.

So, reading back, it looks like I have just given you all the reasons you should like me...but today, that UGLY BITCH reared her head.  Today, I found out that someone I've helped for months on end took advantage of someone else.....someone like me, someone trusting, naive and innocent....(ok we all know I am not niave and innocent but she was.)  This is what made me ANGRY and this is what this post is all about. 

I know there are people in this world who are users...but I don't want those people in MY world.  And when you use someone that I know, through association, you have used ME....and when it becomes connected to MY name, you have used ME again. And at some point I WILL MAKE YOU VERY SORRY!  You have used people in this town for years...I hope I will be the last....don't use my name as a reference, it won't be good.  You have a family and children, you grew up here, and you have burned your last bridge!  I will make sure that no one EVER does anything for you in this town again...I feel sorry for your kids, but YOU set the example for them...and YOU will pay the consequences.

I will not get into the detail here, I just needed to rant....but please if you are like me, a "save the world" person, don't let a few people get you down...I am feeling better already because I just put my rant down in words...I will STILL try to save the world...I just need to check a few references first!

Have a great day!